May The Farts Be With You: A Star Wars Adventure

A long time ago, in a galaxy far away, the rebel forces were locked in a life-and-death struggle against the evil empire for control of the planet Al-Anon. Luckily, a young boy named Anakin Skywalker (played by an actor that you’ll probably never see again) teams up with a pilot named Han-So-Low to rescue Princess Leia (or maybe it’s Queen Amidala, it’s so hard to keep them all straight without seeing the weirdos) from the evil Dark Voice, a practitioner of the dark side. Along the way they get advice from a wise creature named Toad Breath, his father Worm Wood and his mother Sarsa Woody. Sarsa Woody and Queen Amidala were first cousins on their mothers side. When they were young, they would often visit their grandfather who lived in the woods. Their grandfathers name was Boom Skied. When Amidala’s mother died she became the Queen. But her cousin Sarsa Woody remained in the woods and took care of her old grandfather Boom Skied. Queen Amidala became the leader of the empire. She had many friends but she also had many enemies. One of her most tyrannical enemies was the infamous Bertha Bigbutt, Dark Voice’s wife. Even though Dark Voice had to go many places they kept texting on email. They had three children, Handy, Bandy, and Mandy. Sorry to say that they were all space retards. They also had a son named holdonasecond, he died after not one, but two seconds. Bertha Bigbutt and Queen Amidala made a bet, The winner got to eat on chefs head, and the loser was to be imprisoned in a jail on the planet Aliensnot. Where they were only fed boogers on toast. Some of the weapons that they had were, The Deadly Electric Finger Flicker, The Knuckle Popper, and The Horrible Tooth Grenades. Luckily for Queen Amidala’s Army, the opposing soldiers only had two teeth each, one on top, one on the bottom so they were out of ammunition very quick. All of the soldier’s dentist’s had warned them not to use both teeth, they also mentioned that they were only supposed to be used in case of an extreme emergency. Now that the war is over, there was a huge line at the dentist’s office all requesting tooth implants. Then, all of the soldiers finally at peace, they went to Tatooine, and had baked hogs head for dinner with grilled leopard sandwich. Bertha Bigbutt and her army got in a starship and shot explosive rubber chickens at the Amidala kingdom. And then Queen Amidala shouted “is that all you’ve got! How about some fries with that! And the space collectible toys too!” Furious, Dark Voice captured Anakin and flew to a place where they could have a war in peace. A few of the weapons that they planned on using were, a spiky Frisbee, The Acid Spitter, The Baby Hook, small but very pointy. Before they could use any of the weapons, a soldier ran in, saluted Dark Voice, and used the baby hook on Dark Voice and Anakin. The soldier began as a king, but he gave to much orders so everybody killed him and Queen Amidala Ruled space until she died. May The Farts Be With You!
The End